![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/IMG_2507.png\")
<\/a><\/p>\nThink before you speak<\/h2>\n
I think we can all agree that the old saying \u201cSticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me\u201d isn\u2019t quite right. When I was younger, I got into a fight with my mom and, in a moment of fury, spat out, \u201cI hate you,\u201d then stormed off to my room, mad about a subject that I can\u2019t even recall. I woke up the next morning flooded with guilt. I apologized to her, and while she forgave me, she reminded me words cannot be unspoken.<\/p>\n
Words, like actions, set off a chain reaction that cannot be undone.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Words are powerful entities that can divide or unite people with equal ease. As we grow in our careers, we often forget that our voice is elevated, too. Whether it\u2019s the advice you give one direct report or the vision you set for a 300-person team, your words are powerful and they hold weight. Your words can be the difference-maker in a day, relationship or career. What you say cannot be unsaid, so use your words carefully and kindly.<\/p>\n
Face conflict head-on<\/h2>\n
When I was a teenager, I got into a fight with a girl at school, and I asked my mom if I could stay home sick the next day. I was panicked and didn\u2019t want to face her. To my shock, my mom said, \u201cNo.\u201d I felt betrayed, but she impressed upon me that avoiding a problem will never be a solution. My 16-year-old self hated this guidance, but she was right.<\/p>\n
Fast-forward to my first time managing a team, and I realized I hated giving critical feedback. I avoided it at every turn but realized that without it, situations only worsened.<\/p>\n
Being a good manager means having tough conversations; being a good leader means handling them with grace.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Whether it\u2019s performance feedback or addressing differences of opinion, I\u2019ve learned to be direct, honest and respectful. Avoiding tough conversations doesn\u2019t set anyone up for success. It doesn\u2019t help people grow, change their behavior or understand how to improve their work. As much as facing confrontation head-on can be anxiety-inducing and uncomfortable, honest conversations are where growth resides.<\/p>\n
Pay it forward<\/h2>\n
When I was a kid, one of my now very good friends was painfully quiet and shy. As a result, she mostly kept to herself. On a Girl Scout trip we both attended, we were asked to pick buddies to spend the day alongside. She wasn\u2019t on the top of anyone\u2019s list. What my mom saw that I did not was that she likely wouldn\u2019t be at the top of any of the girls\u2019 lists. My mom quietly volunteered me to be her buddy before the selection process began.<\/p>\n
As I\u2019ve grown older, I\u2019ve realized that inclusivity is not always a natural instinct. It takes practice, and that starts with recognition. I now take stock of the room and who is in it: Who is comfortable talking? How do your colleagues engage with one another?<\/p>\n
What my mom taught me that trip stuck with me. Not everyone is going to be the most outgoing or easy to spot in a crowd \u2014 and it doesn\u2019t make them any less qualified or capable. When you\u2019re lucky enough to have a position of choice or a voice, use it to bolster others. Make everyone feel welcome and a part of the team.<\/p>\n
Be protective but honest<\/h2>\n
Growing up, I absolutely hated school. After skipping class beyond what could be considered typical for a senior, my mom was asked to sit down with my principal and the teachers of classes I had a particular distaste for. I noticed that time after time, my mom listened but also challenged their feedback. She called out my stellar grades when faced with feedback on poor attendance. She also championed my passion for and commitment to after-school activities. When we left and got home, she screamed at me. I didn\u2019t recognize the woman who was just standing up for me an hour before.<\/p>\n
As I grew in my career, I worked under managers and then became a manager myself; that\u2019s when I learned the lesson underneath:<\/p>\n
Praise in public, criticize in private.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
My mom used to love to tell me that she could say whatever she wanted to me but that no one else could. When I took on leading a team, I realized I felt the same way. I was fiercely protective of my people. I stood up for them, fought for them and pushed back on their behalf\u2014but I never lowered my expectations for them.<\/p>\n
As a manager, you have to strike a delicate balance between giving critical feedback and pushing someone to grow, and it\u2019s different for every person. Some people love direct feedback; others find it soul-crushing. As managers, it\u2019s our job to find that balance by person so we can help them achieve their max potential in their professional journeys.<\/p>\n
As a teen, I begrudged my mother\u2019s advice. But now, I crave it, study it and hold onto it. In fact, when someone is kind enough to pay me a compliment, I often proudly reply, \u201cThanks, I learned it from my mom.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
What they don\u2019t teach you in school I was fortunate enough to go to school for an MBA in management and leadership, where I learned from renowned professors. I have read countless books authored by some of the greatest leaders of our time and have been grateful to work for and alongside some of the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":49,"featured_media":30806,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-30766","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-team-hearts"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_CA\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What they don\u2019t teach you in school I was fortunate enough to go to school for an MBA in management and leadership, where I learned from renowned professors. I have read countless books authored by some of the greatest leaders of our time and have been grateful to work for and alongside some of the […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Hearts & Science\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1920\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Dana Basile\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"\u00c9crit par\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Dana Basile\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimation du temps de lecture\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Dana Basile\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e\"},\"headline\":\"4 leadership lessons from my mom\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":1027,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2021\\\/05\\\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png\",\"articleSection\":[\"#TeamHearts\"],\"inLanguage\":\"fr-CA\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/\",\"name\":\"4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2021\\\/05\\\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"fr-CA\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"fr-CA\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2021\\\/05\\\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2021\\\/05\\\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png\",\"width\":1920,\"height\":1280},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/fr-ca\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"4 leadership lessons from my mom\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/\",\"name\":\"Hearts & Science\",\"description\":\"Global Marketing Agency\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"fr-CA\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/hearts-science.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e\",\"name\":\"Dana Basile\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"fr-CA\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Dana Basile\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/","og_locale":"fr_CA","og_type":"article","og_title":"4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science","og_description":"What they don\u2019t teach you in school I was fortunate enough to go to school for an MBA in management and leadership, where I learned from renowned professors. I have read countless books authored by some of the greatest leaders of our time and have been grateful to work for and alongside some of the […]","og_url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/","og_site_name":"Hearts & Science","article_published_time":"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00","article_modified_time":"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1920,"height":1280,"url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Dana Basile","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"\u00c9crit par":"Dana Basile","Estimation du temps de lecture":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/"},"author":{"name":"Dana Basile","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/#\/schema\/person\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e"},"headline":"4 leadership lessons from my mom","datePublished":"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/"},"wordCount":1027,"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","articleSection":["#TeamHearts"],"inLanguage":"fr-CA"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/","url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/","name":"4 leadership lessons from my mom – Hearts & Science","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","datePublished":"2021-05-06T21:26:56+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-06T21:51:11+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/#\/schema\/person\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"fr-CA","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"fr-CA","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","width":1920,"height":1280},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/leadership-lessons-from-my-mom\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"4 leadership lessons from my mom"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/","name":"Hearts & Science","description":"Global Marketing Agency","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"fr-CA"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/#\/schema\/person\/73c1bb33b09a449d4f6bb72ff1350a7e","name":"Dana Basile","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"fr-CA","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32d3b9953aee6ef3b463ac292e5c697e72d925b57cf17ecbba056f0a39c57455?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Dana Basile"}}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/Hearts-Science-mom-post-1.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"publishpress_future_workflow_manual_trigger":{"enabledWorkflows":[]},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30766","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/49"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=30766"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30766\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/30806"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=30766"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=30766"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hearts-science.com\/fr-ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=30766"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}